What does Diet Pepsi, my sister-in-law, and Tina Fey’s Bossypants have in common?

They saved my life.

Diet Pepsi out of the soda fountain only is a rare splurge.  Recently it was necessary to keep me away while driving from Florida to Michigan.  My sister-in-law Bethani has a rare sense of humor when delivering accounts of their life. Her version of teaching kids to read in the hallway of a school, my nephews crazy blood types, & the latest adventures of my brother provided  what was necessary to keep me alert on poor radio reception roadways. And Tina Fey…well she is downright funny, certainly sarcastic, refreshingly honest, appropriately edgy and she read me her book Bossypants for hours, thus the  #1 reason I was able to keep driving all the way from our townhome on the water to our 100 year old home in the Mitten.  I am alive and living in Grand Rapids MI.   Thank you Bethani, Tina, DP from the soda fountain.

It is beautiful here.  People from here bring you all kinds of freshly picked apples to say, “Hi, we are glad you are here.” Our girls are here and we can walk to each others houses.  The farmers market is more convenient to walk to than to drive to.  And this 100 year old house has the claw foot tub I asked for in a selfish prayer of want, not need; and it makes me think about my grandma Rozie and her farmhouse  in Iowa that I loved to visit.

Two weeks after our arrival here, we used our packing skills and moving brawn to move my parents from their beloved lake haven in Minnesota to Iowa, where they’ve been greeted warmly and have easy access to grandchildren.  Due to the large amount of recent experience with moving, I thought I would pass on some reality and a couple of helpful tips if moving  is in your near future.

Moving is traumatic.

Say yes if people want to bring you meals when your house is in chaos.  You will not feel like cooking and you do need to keep up your strength.  You may have to succumb to fast food, delivery pizza, ramen noodles and cold cereal.  No one will die.

Even if you are looking forward to it, moving includes loss and grief.  I’m not kidding.  Weird behavior due to grief will be seen in adults, children and pets.  Expect it.  Hugs and ice-cream help.  (So do adult beverages, for the adults…)

Craigslist is an affordable way to get a lot of boxes.  Apple boxes are the very best. Before you start packing, get all your supplies: boxes, lots of packing tape, packing paper, bubble wrap, duct tape, paper/pens, multiple sharpies because they walk away.  Its frustrating to get into the packing zone and not have what you need.

Colored duct tape is Fun and helpful.  Every room gets a different color.  Home depot has a healthy selection.  Secure boxes with packing tape (3M is the best.  Don’t use the cheap stuff  – you WILL swear) and get a heavy duty tape gun.  Put a piece of colored duct tape on top of or across the corner of your box.  This will help you see it from multiple sides when the box is stacked and believe you me, there will be stacks  Sharpies write on that tape nicely.

Write on tape OR number boxes and write on a piece of paper/notebook, the number of the box and list what is inside.  I did both for this last move.  The only thing I have not found is my winter bedding.  Where in the world can a King size quilt hide? I’m slightly concerned I took it to a cleaners in FL and forgot it there.  Why write on the box, even if you are not moving far?  BECAUSE YOU CANNOT REMEMBER WHAT YOU PUT IN THE BOX!  This is a universal fact.  No one’s memory is that sharp when the homespace gets deconstructed then reconstructed.  You can’t pack in a day or two and I promise you cannot keep track of what is in each box.  Keep track of your children, each other, pets,  whatever medication you’re on, phone/computer chargers, your Bible, and a clean pair of underware.  Write on the boxes people.

To pack dishes that you don’t want to break (this is assuming there are some you have that you hope might break so you have an excuse to get new ones.  For pity’s sake, don’t pack those dishes please – give them away and get new ones when you arrive):  put paper plates or dishcloths between each plate.  Make a stack of five or six plates.  Wrap that stack in a beach or bath towel.  Put the stack on its side in a heavy-duty box that is padded on the bottom with a pillow or towels or packing paper.  I just packed and moved two households across MANY states.  Nothing broke.  BOOM Shakalaka!

Throw things away, give things away.  Sell things on Craigslist that you don’t use, are done with, haven’t touched in a year or more or simply do not like.  You won’t miss a thing.  OK, true confession:  I do miss my piano, but it went to a really good home.

You will need things in your new space that you don’t have.  Happens every time.  You will have things form your old space that don’t work in the new.  Craigslist – Thrift – or get what you want that works, fits, makes you happy.  It’s only money.  Moderation people…don’t misunderstand me here.

During the packing and the moving, Rule Number One:  Be nice to each other.  If one person is losing it – let them, bring them hot chocolate, ice cream, coffee, their blankie.  Remember, your turn is right around the corner.  Our rule:  anyone can fall apart, just not at the same time.  You may have to adjust this for the number of people in your household.

Once you’re our and then you’re in, allow time for your mind, feet, heart, eyes, and emotions to move in and find their way around the new homespace.

Have a picnic on the floor of your new place.  Eat favorite food groups.  Call it camping with drywall.   This is a great way to break it in with memory making.

Get used to this question:  “Where is the___?”

People move everyday.  Mission:  It’s Possible!  The rough part doesn’t last forever and there are plenty of good parts.

Do you have a tip or some reality to share on the topic?  Please do.

Feeling welcomed to our new homespace, home state.


5 Replies to “What does Diet Pepsi, my sister-in-law, and Tina Fey’s Bossypants have in common?”

  1. i don’t want to think about it. I don’t want to think about it. I don’t want to think about it. But I’m glad you’re writing again!


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