A handicapped sticker hanging in the window of a Porsche Carrera – oxymoronic?
41% of Palm Beach County homeowners ‘under water’ on their houses – contradictory to the American Dream?
In weakness finding strength… In surrender being victorious… In dying, really living… – inverse to human nature?
These are my ponderings of the week. All of them rub me the wrong way. Honestly – who doesn’t prefer to be in control, be in the know, be on the path you laid out, be confident and successful in all circumstances, be healthy-wealthy (or at least financially sound) wise? To accomplish this state of ‘be’, I tend towards fighting losing battles; sucking it up and moving ahead; pulling myself up by my bootstraps; pushing through full-steam ahead even if I am steamless. Do I have any company who share this way of life/living?
If I had the wisdom of Solomon, I would certainly give advice to seekers that this way is unsuitable for any human being. I’ve been given that wisdom myself. Unfortunately it comes naturally to go the way of doing the same thing over and over and never getting different results.
22 years ago in the deep water of grief, I faced a crossroad with a choice to make: Choose bitterness or Choose Joy. Circumstances lended themselves to the first choice. Joy was contradictory. I choose the second (with a little divine nudge). And so found life in dying, experienced strength in weakness. This choice did not require bootstrap strength or mustering self-generated steam. It required obedience and surrender and victory followed, in time.
There are similarities in my current circumstances to 22 years ago. These adventure days are marked by loss, unfamiliar territory, lack of control, mental/emotional fatigue, the need to live day by day – sometimes moment by moment. That Joy choice was a one time thing, but it’s also a daily one too.
It’s curious how thankful things get overshadowed by troublesome things. It’s also curious when I let them blend together rather compete for my undivided attention, they become harmony.
There is more than plenty to be thankful for in my current circumstances. And so I shall choose Joy again today and let the harmonious sounds play while I live.
I am thankful that I am a homeowner in Boulder county and a renter in Palm Beach county. I am thankful I live in a community where they love dogs. I am thankful that we were invited to 2 parties by some of our new neighbors today. I am thankful for coolers to hold the food from the fridge and freezer that is currently needing a thaw. I am thankful for a man who is taking me out to dinner tonight since our food is currently living in temporary cooler housing. I’m thankful for my friend Ruthie. I am thankful for parents and children and friends in Colorado who are helping me choose Joy and keep things in perspective. I’m thankful for all the awesome birds that live here and that I am no longer afraid of the little lizards that are everywhere. I am thankful I can see and for a puzzle which distracts me from stinky thinkin. I haven’t gotten lost, in fact I’ve acclimated to the driving surprisingly well – a gift. The humidity feels so nice – as the temperatures are moderate which is another unexpected reason to be thankful. Calvin and Pekoe have adapted easily – thanks again. We’ve located good mexican food – different from Colorado, not that spicy, but unique and delicious…THANK Goodness!
And I suppose – there is something for someone to be thankful for if they can drive their Porsche yet have the need for a handicap sticker!
Laura – choosing joy one day at a time.